Are you planting in soil that needs to be tilled? Needs fertilizer? Needs weeding?
Your desires are not always conscious.
There are aspects of your being that are more of a hidden nature and these parts; as well as their wounding and gifts need to be brought to the light of your awareness.
If you are not experiencing or receiving what is in alignment with your known desires look to your subconscious mind for your unknown desires. These are the desires that are not yet consciously known to you. This is also the realm of fears,inner conflict and conflicts of interests. Feelings, desires and intentions of a conflicting nature attract blocks and opposition in your manifestations.
Very often when we have divergent needs, inner conflict and are fearful of our next level this will manifest as some would say: “self sabotage”.
Examine what is happening in your life for areas of unfulfilled needs, feelings, imaginings, desires and intentions that are assisting in the co-creation you are experiencing in your life at this time.
When one really contemplates in honesty, truth and integrity one can begin to see how opposing feelings, desires and opposite intentions can create stalemates and thwart one’s conscious desires.
This is not bad. It is beyond good or bad. It is a process that is a necessary step in harmonization and reconciliation of aspects of self and expression of being. This step in awareness is a call from the Higher Self- the Guiding Principle of your Inner Psyche to get clear, cleanse what is cloggy, and become aware of what is holding one back. Awareness can bring new understanding and new directions that reflect one’s inner changes.
In many ways your circumstances can be showing you what you want to happen on an unconscious level.
If you feel/think that your circumstances are not what you want; then use your Spiritual Tools and take the time to reconsider your desires and intentions.
What you focus on gains strength; whether for what is life enhancing or what is not life enhancing. The manifestations that come from your Higher Self will reflect what is of the highest good for all concerned in any given situation. What is empowering is ultimately uplifting, even if you have to go deeper within to realize it.
1- Lovingly and with compassion observe the state of your garden and soil.
Take time (3-15 days) to really observe what is growing in your life and what you are attracting.
If it is not in alignment to the "big picture" and your conscious needs and wants then you need to take the time to look deeper. This is where meditation comes in.
2-Look at the flowers and weeds, and the seeds you have been sowing.
Write down or make a voice note of what you observe, without censoring. Really be honest with yourself and take note of the "state of your garden" - Life. Make sure that you also note what is supporting you and what truly gives you joy. Sometimes we go for what we "think" will bring us joy while ignoring or not truly noticing what has been bringing us joy. I am emphasizing joy here instead of "happiness" as joy is not fleeting. Happiness has an opposite; which is unhappiness. Happiness is fleeting and usually dependent on "outer" circumstances. There is no "unjoy".....only Joy. Joy is innate. It is possible to feel joy and live joyfully even in the worst of circumstances and the "highs and lows" of life. Joy is a Soul Quality.
3- Prepare for the deeper tilling of the soil.
connect in with the inner child/little kid/inner child aspect of you Set some boundaries at this time so that you can do some deeper innerwork, with the "little part of you" feeling safe and protected by you. It is very difficult to look at "what we have done or not done" when we don't feel safe and that are mistakes are ok and simply part of our learning and growth.
4-Take time to really check out the soil. You have to look below the surface.
Schedule some sacred time an space for yourself. Get really quiet in a room you feel comfortable and safe. Read or listen to what you wrote in your journal or voice note of what you observed in your life. Feel what feelings or emotions come up for you. See what situations from your past come up for you. Write this down or make a voice note of this, noting which feelings, emotions or situations chronically come up for you. Also, note the theme/s that seems to play out for you.
Some themes that come up for people are:
" I can never get ahead." "People don't understand me." "I have to do everything on my own." "My boss doesn't appreciate me." "I am always alone." " I can never do what is right for me." "I have no time for me." "I'm not good enough." "Something's wrong with me."
There are many more themes of the pattern of wounding and conditioning.
5- Survey the deeper layers of your soil.
Now take some time to write out the themes and feelings/emotions. After you write these out write down the opposite to what you have been experiencing. For instance if you have been feeling "not good enough" and this is a theme that has been playing out in your life you are now going to imagine yourself feeling good enough. Focus on the times that you felt good enough, or that someone complemented you. Write down as many as you can think of, and/or make a voice note.
Setting your environment to allow yourself to receive what is right for you.
Listen and/or read your writing and voice notes on this daily for a minimum of 13 days. When you read or listen to the voice note really take in the feeling of the emotion, feeling and quality. Really see yourself and feel yourself in this new light. If you need to- Fake it til you make it. In other words fake it til you really feel it and see it.
Put up little signs and reminders of these qualities. If you are 'working' on fear put up images or reminders for you that reinforce your strength. You can also use scents, incense and essential oils to tune you into the qualities/feelings/emotions you are reinforcing.
Some examples of essentials oils are: peppermint for energy; sage for claity, rosemary for cleansing, positive memories. Lavender for integrating the feminine and healing.
You can also use crystals, stones, rocks and shells. Put these outer support and reminders in places that you can see them and really take them in to your being. Make an effort and conscious focus to enhance what is positively energizing you and focus on what is life enhancing for you.